Movies are fun to watch. But believe it or not most of them are actually educational. Here are things I’ve learned from movies.
- A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds
- One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them than 20 men firing at 1 man.
- Creepy music coming from a cemetery should always be investigated more closely.
- You can tell if somebody is British because they will be wearing a bow tie.
- A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness.
- Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.
- When in love, it is customary to burst into song.
- When confronted by an evil international terrorist, sarcasm and wisecracks are your best weapons.
- Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
- The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
- All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices so you know exactly when they’ll go off.
- When you walk into a room and see the person you are trying to capture or shoot, call out their name or yell ‘Hey!’ or ‘Stop!’ first to give them a sporting chance to run. The element of surprise is overrated…and unfair.
- No Australian adventure is complete without one:
1. A Kangaroo.
2. A Boomerang.
3. Ayers Rock.
4. A Koala.
5. All of the above.
- Drive-ins only show classic horror movies.
- Major disasters always happen in New York.
- Television news bulletins always have an important story that will affect you precisely at that moment.
- Ghosts will always take the time to dim the lights in your house.
- The crowd will always part while you walk into a dance/ball, and everyone will whisper in delight of your beauty. Also, your entrance will always be accompanied by a fitting song. E.g. Taylor Swift’s Today Was A Fairytale
- Everyone in your town/school/workplace is interested in your secrets and lies. They’re also very eager to spread rumours about you.
- Whenever you’re in trouble, no matter where you are, you will not have cell phone reception.
- The doorbell rings and you look through the peep hole and no one is there.
- “Everything will be all right” really means “In a few hours everything will suck!”
- There aren’t very many women in space.
- Always listen to the creepy person.
- You’re likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
- Animals understand us.
- Dogs always know who’s bad and will naturally bark at them.
- All single women have a cat.
- Any assault weapon used by the hero will never run out of ammo.
- In spite of all the many brands of high-tech computers and laptops, when a tech-savvy computer person needs to do a serious job of computer hacking, a Mac is the only computer that can possibly do the job.