I <3 Saturdays: American Oddball…err..um…Idol

Hey guys and girls, men and women, cats and dogs, other species. Welcome to another action packed edition of I ❤ Saturdays. Tonight’s topic: AMERICAN IDOL. For our Idol judges this year, we have Randy Jackson, Keith Urban, Mariah Carey, and E.T. (also known as Nicki Minaj). It’s kind of off-putting to me having Nicki as a judge. I mean she talks in a British accent at random times. Which is fun, but not if you’re judging some contestant and you just randomly say “Hello, Madame, how do you do?” in a British accent. On Thursday, she called a contestant a pretty little ladybug. So that settles it, she really is an alien, because she can’t even tell a person’s species. But American Idol is also very educational. It teaches us about The Great Minajian Revolution, the war that took place in 2013 between Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey. Is it bad I want to see these two in The Hunger Games? Seriously though, they are pretty brutal to each other. This show is pretty predictable and the people can be a bit bland. Which explains why next year it is going to be a sitcom starring Zooey Deschanel. But it is predictable. Okay, so if they show a video about how the contestants’  house burnt down they’re going to get through and if they show a video about the contestant’s obsession over Britney Spears, they’re not. I thought tonight we could hold our own American Idol competition entitled: “Internet Idol”. Here’s our first contestant:

Napkin

RANDY: That was tight, dawg, or..ummm…I guess cat actually.

Keith: Cool.

Nicki: That was just…wow…That was just….wow…..

Mariah: You have potential.

YOU’RE GOING TO HOLLYWOOD!

Next contestant

philosoraptor_258949

 

Randy: Very thought provoking, dawg!

Keith: Very inspiring.

Nicki: That was cool…..(British accent time)..Oh so very lovely darling. (Regularish voice) So cool!

Mariah: You have potential.

You’re going to Hollywood!

Final contestant of the day…..

Autotune

 

Randy: No, Dawg, No. It’s just not for you!

Keith: Sorry man, no.

Nicki: Oh no. They’re calling me out. I must get back to my home planet.

Mariah: You have potential.

It looks like it’s a no!

 

Now…THE RESULTS.

 

 

 

The next…

Internet Idol is

The Napkin Lolcat!!!

Thank you for watching, I am Purple Seacrest, your local news is coming up next!

 

Have A Great Kitty Cat Napkin Autotuned Saturday!

 

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