NEW PAGE(S)

We have 2 new pages that I forgot to tell you about! The Hollywood Dictionary  (a page I can’t describe at all so click here to check it out!) and a sub page to FA-LA-LA entitled Auld Lang Syne. It’s our tribute to New Years with such marvelous content as:

  • Fido The Dog’s New Year’s Resolutions
  • Whiskers The Cat’s New Year’s Resolutions
  • Resolutions You Can Actually Keep
  • Signs You’re At A Bad New Year’s Eve Party

AND MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Click HERE to check that out

Friday Night Fever: LOST IN (Storage) SPACE!!!!!!!!

Well folks, some sad news. From now on, there will only be 3 pictures per post. I know it’s saddening, but just listen why. I currently only have 98.9% storage space left. Now that may seem like a lot, and well, it is. But just to make sure things like Friday Night Fever last longer, I will limit the amount of pictures. Sorry about that. This is also our last post before we go on Winter Break which means it’s our last post of the year. So I just wanna say that over the first year of our website we- UH-OH!!!! THIS ISN’T GOOD! WEEOO! WEEOO! WEEOO! That’s the Pun siren! There are several puns in our area. AND HERE THEY COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • I’m glad I know sign language, it’s pretty handy.
  • I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
  • There’s a lengthy article on Japanese Sword Fighters but I can Samurais it for you!
  • Stealing someone’s coffee is “mugging”.
  • My wife tells me I’m a skeptic-  but I don’t believe a word she says!
  • Puns about monorails always make for decent one liners.
  • I used to be a banker but I lost interest.
  • I avoid funerals because I’m not a mourning person.
  • Never lie to an X-ray technician, they can see right through you.
  • Organ donors put there heart into it.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh good. It’s over!

  • I used to rock climb as a child, but I was much boulder back then.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!??!??!??!?!?!?!?!!!???????!!?!??!

Is that it?

  • The magician got so mad he pulled his hare out.

Okay but now we’re done, right?

  • Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.

NOW WE ARE DEFINITELY DONE WITH THIS! I AM IN CONTROL OF THIS POST AND WHAT GOES IN IT!

  • I’ve been to the dentist several times, so I know the drill.

I-I CAN’T BELIEVE IT. This is my last post of the year and I’ve lost control of it. The puns have taken over. I don’t know what to do! I can’t even post what I want and it’s our final post of 2012.

  • WILL PURPLE GET BACK IN CONTROL OF HIS POST?
  • WILL THE DETAILS ABOUT THAT DEAD CARTOONIST EVER DEVELOP?
  • ARE HARRY STYLES AND TAYLOR SWIFT STILL TOGETHER?

All these questions and more won’t be answered on the next episode of Friday Night Fever!!!!!!!

Apple-iPhone-5-Funny

 

They’d have to make special pants for the iPhone 7 and 8.

Funny-Signs

 

I did notice this this new notice and it will be noted that I noticed this notice and I’ll tell my friends that they need to notice this new notice because it will be noted that you noticed the new notice and your noticing of this new notice has been reported to the authorities so they can notice that you noticed this new notice and then they’ll report it to their friends so they can note that you noticed this new notice.

And now a recurring feature on Friday Night Fever, we’ve probably been doing this for the past 50 years:
Bad Advice Cat Advice Column

where Bad Advice Cat gives you advice for your life.

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More great advice from a great cat! Nice work, Bad Advice Cat.

And…you know, just because this is our last post of the year, I’ll include one more pic:

Chapped lips

 

There you go! See you all in 2013! It’s been a fantastic year, thanks for all of the support. I really didn’t expect this website to get as popular as it did! As I’m typing this, we have 2,703. I’d just like to thank everyone who has followed this website, viewed this website, liked this website, supported this website. It’s been fun and I can’t wait to do it all over again in 2013!

MONDAY MADNESS: The X(mas) Files

Make my wish come true

All I want for Christmas is

You

WHAT?! That’s a bit creepy! Are you telling me you want an actual living human being for Christmas! Even worse, it’s ME! What will you do with me? I mean is that just a thing you do? You just ask for humans for Christmas. Then what? Do you lock them up some where or do experiments on them? I WANT ANSWERS!

All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth

My Two Front Teeth

See My Two Front Teeth

That’s strange! I thought you wanted ME! Now you want your two front teeth?! MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!

Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there’s no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and grandpa we believe.

I have nothing to say about this, I just really like this song. That’s all!

  Well, HO HO HEY there everybody! IT’S CHRISTMAS EVE! AND TOMORROW’S CHRISTMAS! Which means we’ll be taking our Winter Break. It will start on December 29th 2012 and end on January 6th 2013. So we will return on January 7th 2013. Alright well we should probably get started, so here we go:

12 Days

This one pretty much speaks for itself!

O Christmas Tree

The Bookworm’s Christmas Tree!

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“Well, Frosty..I..uh….I….well…I mean….YOU KNOW WHAT MY STORY IS YA JERK! BY THE WAY, SMOKING AIN’T GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH!”

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Which is why you should switch to Weight Watchers!

Alright, well that’s all! May you have a very merry Christmas!

I <3 Saturdays: WHAT THE HECK IS FIGGY PUDDING?!

Oh, bring us a figgy pudding;
Oh, bring us a figgy pudding;
Oh, bring us a figgy pudding and a cup of good cheer

We won’t go until we get some;
We won’t go until we get some;
We won’t go until we get some, so bring some out here

I DON’T HAVE ANY FIGGY PUDDING OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOBODY DOES! I MEAN, WHERE DO YOU EVEN GET THIS STUFF?! FIGGY PUDDING? WOW! AND A CUP OF GOOD CHEER?! GO TO STARBUCKS AND ASK FOR A STRAWBERRIES AND CREAM FRAPPUCCINO!!!! THERE’S YOUR CUP OF GOOD CHEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OKAY, NOW LET ME WATCH ELF! THANKS AND HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even

On the feast of Stephen?! YOU ATE A PERSON! AND YOU CALL THIS MAN YOUR KING?! YOU SICKEN ME! YOU SICKEN ME WENCELAS! TAKE YOUR CANNIBALISM ELSEWHERE!

A day or two ago
I thought I’d take a ride
And soon Miss Fanny Bright
Was seated by my side
The horse was lean and lank
Misfortune seemed his lot
We got into a drifted bank
And then we got upsot

Upsot?! Upsot?! Oh yea, lets make up new words!!! That will really impress Miss Fanny won’t it? GRAB A DICTIONARY AND LEARN REAL WORDS AND GET OUT OF MY BACKYARD!!!

On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
A partridge in a pear tree. 

A partridge in a pear tree? Yes because THAT’S what every single girl wants. They just want a partridge in a pear tree! That’s on everybody’s Christmas list. I WANT A PONY, A BIKE, OH AND A PEAR TREE WITH A PARTRIDGE IN IT! Come on man. That gift is for the birds.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.

Yes. That’s what I think of when I think of foods that Children love. I think of sugar-plums. Not candy, or ice cream, or pizza, or anything children actually eat! No, no, just sugar-plums. And apparently sugar-plums have taken up dancing too. But only in a child’s head. Yea. They just sneak inside a kid’s ear and start doing the Tango.

Well I think I’ve ripped apart enough of your Christmas cheer. Let’s take a look at some funny pictures shall we.

Christmas Therapy

HEY! SNL tonight. (For all of you that don’t know SNL stands for Saturday Night Live, it is a sketch comedy series. There is mild language and sexual references so we suggest knowing that before sitting around at 11:30 for quality family time) Actually tonight it’s on at 10:00 AND 11:30. @ 10 is last Saturday’s episode, which I assume they’re playing it because it was their Christmas episode. And then @ 11:30 is the rerun with Bruno Mars, which will be probably as good as it was the first time.

Stanley

From the creators of Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer comes….Stanley The Spare Reindeer!

Without Glasses

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Has it really come to this?!

Friday Night Fever: The End Has Come To An End

I did it!!!!!!! I SURVIVED! Man that was quite the adventure today! Especially that one part where the continents separated and the whole state of California was ripped in half. And then there were all the terrible earthquakes in Britain. And then there were those random fires in France. I was really scared as I gripped on to the little land that remained, but I managed to stay strong, unfortunately the rest of my family was not so lucky and my eyes are filling with tears thinking about it. I saved myself instead of them. And that’s something that will haunt me for the rest of my life.

 

What’s that? None of that stuff ever happened and the Mayans were wrong. Hmmm, now that I think about it I guess you’re right. Actually I know you’re right. Everyone knows you’re right. Okay, let’s face it, they predicted the world will end when they can barely predict the weather. Just sayin’! It seems like every year lately they predict the world’s going to end! They predicted it last year, they PROBABLY predicted it in 2010. They kept talking about this “2012” thing back in 2009, and 2008. Back in 2000 they said the world would end because of what I am on right now…COMPUTERS!!!! Because that makes sense right? Even if all our computers couldn’t transfer from 1999 to 2000, why would the world end? It’s not like our world is run by computers! That’s just a myth put out by Apple and sci-fi films! But that was back in 2000, when we listened to Britney Spears, thinking about how nice and innocent she was. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! What do you think 2012 would say to 2000? What do you think 2000 would say to 2012? Why am I getting extremely off topic? Why don’t I just show you some funny pictures and get this over with?

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Apocalyptic Kaboom

 

The-end-of-the-world

funny-mayan-end-of-the-world-quote

 

 

Well that’s all guys! Come back tomorrow for a very Christmas themed I ❤ Saturdays!

MONDAY MADNESS: This Year’s (Stupidity) In Review

Well, they say Friday’s the end of the world and I believe ’em. Trust me, I was a skeptic at first but then after analyzing the facts, I realized this year’s biggest events were proof that the end is near. Don’t believe me? Take a look at all the signs below and then tell me that the world won’t end in 4 days.

(P.S. The events are ranked by stupidity level. P.S.S. I still don’t really think the world will end Friday. P.S.S.S. I have nothing for this one, it’s just I thought I’d give P.S.S.S some glory because it never gets used )

  4. Make like a banana and SPLIT! The Justin And Selena Breakup-  This year was the end of many things, the end of Twinkies (get to that later), the end of Twilight, but these things can not compare to the sorrows that were given to the end of true love. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez broke up this year. Truly sad. It’s a real shame. They were so cute together. But why’d they break up. Many say it was because Selena saw Justin with a Victoria’s Secret model at The Lion King. But really it wasn’t that he was with a Victoria’s Secret model. It was that Justin saw the Lion King without her. (NOTE: This fact has not been proven but it just sounds so stupid it may be true).

Justin-and-Selena

  3. When Harry Met Sally..err..um…Taylor. HAYLOR MADNESS!- You know, a recent study has came out that has shown that those in a steady relationship will live longer which must be terrible news for Taylor Swift. Let’s face it, Taylor Swift has had a lot of failed relationships. And another one has begun. I’m not saying this won’t work out, I’m just saying…..I guess that’s pretty much what I’m saying. But who knows, this could be true love!….HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway she’s now with lead singer of the popular boy band One Direction, Harry Styles. This was really a bad move on Taylor’s part. If she’s going to date Harry, 25 million billion trillion bagadazillion people will hate her, and if she breaks up with him and says bad things about him in her break up song, then 25 million billion trillion bagadazillion people will hate her. The best choice for her was just not to start.

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You know I’ll bet you she’ll call the song “I Went In The Wrong Direction”. Or “You Weren’t My Styles”. OR maybe it’ll be a nice friendly break up and they’ll have a 1D, T-Swift collaboration and call it “We Used To Be Beautiful, But Now We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.”

  2. Will Work For Food  Hostess goes bankrupt- You know the world will end when the only food made to survive the apocalypse is dead. Twinkies (as well as various other popular desserts) no longer exist because Hostess, the company that makes them filed for bankruptcy this year.    It’s sad to think that this next generation is going to grow up and live their lives not knowing what a Twinkie is. They’ll never get to tasted that delicious cream filling. It’s quite sad.

photo

Think of all the consequences that come with Hostess going bankrupt.

  • The people who eat Hostess cakes will discover apples and strawberries are real foods, not just artificial flavors.
  • Little Debbie will go to court for custody of Twinkie The Kid.
  • Scientists may find out what is in a Twinkie.

1. The Tragic School Shooting The school shooting that took place in Newtown, Connecticut- This is where this otherwise supposed to be funny post takes a more serious turn, this is where we start to talk about a MAJOR issue that is more serious than a stupid celebrity couple or the loss of a snack food. This is an ACTUAL tragedy. If you hadn’t heard, 20 kids and 5 staff members were shot and killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtoqn, Connecticut. 20 children?!?!?!?!??!?!?! That’s 20 Christmases…..GONE! 20 kids that will never get to pursue their dreams, 20 kids that will never get to grow up, become a teenager, get a job, get a wife, and have children. 20 lives have been lost. 2o families have been affected by this. And that just makes me sick.

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That’s all. See you next week.