Upcoming Board Game Movies

WAIT A MINUTE! I thought you said you wouldn’t be posting. Well see, I have an iPad. But I don’t know how to upload pics onto wordpress with an iPad. So I might post some good book titles and such but not much. Well, anyway board game movies are becoming quite the thing right now. They just released Battleship, and Candyland and Monopoly are already in the works. Here are also some other upcoming board game film adaptations.

ALL 100% FAKE (for now).

Hasbro’s Twister
Tagline: The most twisted thing in life is LOVE.
Plot summary:
They had to call this Hasbro’s Twister since there’s already a movie called Twister. Anyway, in Hasbro’s Twister, Samantha Peters (Taylor Swift) is a world proffessional gymnast. She trained herself using the Twister method, an illegal way of training using a mat with colored dots all over and a machine that reveals every move needed for the next competition. Now the police (Zac Efron)are hot on her tail. But when he accidentally falls in love with her, can he still arrest her? Or will love overpower it?

Crocodile Dentist
Tagline: Get ready to croc
Plot summary:
Dr. Maxwell C. Gator is presented a crocodile with a cavity. The problem is, Maxwell has been a vet for only two days. Can he cure the crocodile or will the crocodile bite him in the process

Connect Four
Tagline:Two’s company, Three’s a crowd, Four’s a family
Plot summary:
May June-July August and November October-September August and their two kids are a very dysfunctional family. So they try to move their rooms closer together. They try to put them across in a row. Diagonal row. Above each other. And strangely enough, each way brings them closer, but each time the floor gets damaged. SPOILER ALERT:Their dog dies.

Guess Who?
Plot summary:
Jake Jackson (Nicolas Cage)is a stalker. No doubt about it. He asks people questions online and words it like a child. The worst part is, they answer. But one man turns the tables, and a brutal war.

Don’t Break The Ice
Tagline: Chill.
Plot summary:
Scientists that are studying Antartica find something disturbing beneath the ice. An
unidentified creature lives under the ice. And it’s
going to show those scientists that they should have never broke the
ice.

KerPlunk

Tagline: The last straw
Plot summary:
A new device made of straws promises to be good. But it soon becomes evil. Four people take the straws out, but if the whole thing collapses, the company is ready to kill.

Parcheesi
Tagline: It’s anything but cheesi.
Plot summary:
It’s the year 2055 and Indian royalty are obsessed with capturing ancient game pieces.

That’s all folks!

Friday Night Fever: Vacation Edition

I have some bad news. I’ve came down with a bad case of the Friday Night Fever. LOL! Well tomorrow I leave for vacation. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  I’m excited about vacation. But I don’t wanna leave you for a whole 9 DAYS! I mean we’ve never been apart for this long!! Do you remember when we were sitting there by the water? You put your arm around me for the first time. Then I said “CUT IT OUT!! DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIDAY NIGHT FEVER OR NOT?!” You are the best thing that’s ever been..eh never mind I kinda just killed it. Some of you may be going on vacation too and because of that I’ve created

THE FRIDAY NIGHT FEVER VACATION GUIDE

A two part in-depth and informative guide on how to make your vacation a memory you’ll wish was your present.

PART 1

  Packing

Make sure you pack clean shirts with you. Yes folks that’s actually the guy’s shirt if you look very closely.

A clean pair of socks is also necessary!

Some places can be sunny (or cold) so you may wanna bring your hat.

Some hotels allow pets, not many though. Check your hotel to see if they allow pets.


OTHER THINGS TO BRING ALONG

  • Your car
  • Your magical pajamas
  • Your epic suit
  • Your angry face
  • Your cookie jar
  • Your favorite kind of waffles
  • Me
  • A clean pair of underwear
  • Spare change
  • An umbrella
  • Your brain
  • Pop Tarts (the fruity kind)
  • Pop Tarts (the non-fruity kind)
  • Yourself

PART 2

When you get there

RULES

Most vacation areas will have signs that will give rules. For example if you were to be at Universal Theme Parks some examples of warning signs or rules would be If you are pregnant you can’t ride or No flash photography or video taping or Put unsecured items in locker areas or Drink the Butterbeer responsibly.

 INTERNET

Most hotels allow internet service but you usually have to pay for it. (P.S. If you don’t get what’s funny about this pic then look at how the boy is using the chair)

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TOURISTS AND ACTUAL RESIDENTS

 There’s a huge difference between the visitors and the people who live in the destination. Look at the people in the front. Now look at the man in the back. Who are the tourists, and who lives there?

SOUVENIRS

There are a lot of great things you can buy to remember your trip. Some of the best ones are cheap too. For example, in the pic above it’s HARD TO SEE why anybody wouldn’t want a bargain like that.

FUN THINGS TO DO

There are a lot of hands on, interactive, entertaining, and indescribable things to do on your trip. But they’re always safe. I repeat totally safe. Even thought it may feel like you’re swinging in the sky and the earth has gone sideways, it never really is….

LOVE DECLARATIONS

 

  A lot of people get engaged on vacations. Like when they go to France. Or Hawaii. Or Flushing, Michigan. Yep, love is in the air unless you’re a dinosaur.

SHARING YOUR VACATION PHOTOS WITH OTHERS

Your friends probably wanna see the 188 photos you took on this trip, right? So why not upload them to Facebook? However if you don’t want people to see your photos, upload them to MySpace. (Lol, I kinda have to credit this MySpace joke to, in my opinion, the greatest talkshow host on TV right now, Jimmy Fallon, who told a similar joke).

 EPILOGUE

 We hope after these tips we’ve made your vacation trip a part of you that you’ll never let go.

 ABOUT THE AUTHOR

 Purplehuskyman is a world champion tennis player. He lives in a four story mansion and is the richest man in the world. He has a pet penguin named Sal and his favorite food is gourmet cheese drizzled on Parmesan chicken. He is married to Lady GaGa. He has written other bestsellers such as How I Went From Time Wasting To Tennis: My Secret To Success , Some People Call Lady GaGa Eccentric, I Call Her My Wife:  The 411 On Being Married To A Pop Star and Penguins Can Be Pets Too: The Reasons I Adopted Sal. He used to be in the popular boys band The Jonas Brothers, under the stage name Nick Jonas.

  Well I’m sure I’ve bored you enough for now. See you back here the Friday after next Friday for more.

Wednesday

I’m bored and I found a whole bunch of awesome pics and can’t wait to show them on Friday, SO I NEED TO SHOW THEM NOW! By the way, Friday will be my last Friday Night Fever.                                                                                                                                                                                                                  FOR A WEEK! Ha. Did I scare you at first. I’m going on vacation. And if you think no Friday Night Fever for a week is bad, then you’ll really hate this: NO I ❤ Saturdays FOR A WHOLE TWO WEEKS?! What will we do without each other. So I’m trying to post as much junk as I can before then….

Doggone it! I hate when that happens.

Just your average american family: The pet- A dog who totally doesn’t look like he’s gonna bite your face off at all, the husband and wife- Husband, who’s smiling for the camera, Wife, who doesn’t resemble a fish whatsoever. And a little girl hiding up in the corner of the stair case.

OOH! You better take that one back or else Chuck Norris will be coming after you.

VROOM! VROOM! VROOM! Good evening race car fans…let’s check on the car sponsored by Purina…

ENGARD!

That’s all folks….

MONDAY MADNESS

Mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-MONDAY! IT”S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH YEAH MONDAY! WOO HOO OH YEA! Well today is the premiere of the new show “The Glass House”. Do you know what this means? It means that these reality shows are bringing us closer and closer to The Hunger Games. In this show, there are these people that live in this glass house and we the people of America control them. We choose where they sleep, what they wear, and what they eat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Would you really want people choosing what you eat?! What if they chose a food that you could be allergic too. And living with strangers?! Our parents always tell us, don’t talk to strangers. Look what good that did, now we’re living with them. But back to this food thing, do I really want some guy named Frank from Gary, Indiana choosing my dinner?! And do I really want people viewing me selected times in the day on a live feed online. Oh, 11 AM, is now the time stalkers are on the web?!  I mean seriously, reality tv was cute when it was Ryan Seacrest but now it’s gone too far! Now I know some people will be interested in this and choose what they do, but what I think I’ll choose to do is cancel the show.

OOH! It’s awesome when people talk back to signs, like this one below:

THAT’S RIGHT! WE’RE TAKING BACK OUR RESTROOM! OH YEA!

I could use a job…….

Oh my gosh, how much does that portrait cost?!

Hey Olympics, I have an idea……

“Hello welcome to Atlantic Air, our flight attendants will be willing to serve you at anytime.”

That’s funny and I ain’t LION! I know that was corny but a MANE part of these jokes are! Alright I’ll stop it, I know these jokes are freaKING you out! Okay but I’m done FUR real this time! Seriously though, I’m done.

Anybody gotta quarter? XD

Well that’s all for now. But don’t be sad because we can do it all over again next Monday. Actually we can’t. I’m going on vacation. So I’ll post the Monday after that. BYE!

(over) 200 HITS

I’m Purple Huskyman, here, as always, with your Monday morning report.  In BREAKING NEWS we now have OVER 200 hits!

SURPRISING RIGHT!!! Not only that but…….WE HAVE A NEW FOLLOWER! (put your hands in the air like you just don’t care!) Thank you to Logan Krum Movie Reviews for subscribing. I checked out his site and it is one of your greatest sources for movie reviews!! It’s totally worth checking out. All of our subscribers websites are worth checking out. That’s the awesome thing about this site. Not only do we have a great website! (yes I did just toot my own horn!) But our followers have great websites too. THE TIME WASTING REVOLUTION IS STARTING EVERYBODY! IT’S STARTING!

Ah That Hollywood!

Hollywood is home to many celebrities. And the word celebrities is home to many jokes! 😀 You know what’s coming….

CELEBRITY JOKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Why did the chicken cross the road?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed,
I’ve not been told!

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 12, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

It was actually to get to the other side but I guess those work too!

WARNING!

It’s that time again. Computer viruses are spreading. Here’s a few that are going around!

Tim Allen virus: Appears helpful, only to destroy your hard drive upon contact.

Arnold Schwarzenegger virus: Terminates and stays resident. It’ll be back.

Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.

 

Why does Snoop Dog bring an umbrella with him?

Fo’ Drizzle

How does Lady Gaga like her steak?

Raw Raw Raw Raw Raw Raw

Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about famous classical composers. Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger were in the room. “Who do you want to play?” Spielberg asked Bruce Willis. “I’ve always been a big fan of Chopin,” said Bruce. “I’ll play him.” “And you, Sylvester?” asked Spielberg. “Mozart’s the one for me!” said Sly. “And what about you?” Spielberg asked Arnold Schwarzenegger. “I’ll be Bach,” said Arnie.

 

SUNDAY FUNDAY!!

Sunday! Sunday! Sunday Sunday Sunday! TODAY’S FATHER’S DAY!! Happy Father’s Day to all those who apply.

Ah this is so cute.  NOW FIDO GET OUT OF MY STUFF!

Make sure you get that ‘stache.

Snuggle Time!

Part of McDonalds new light menu!

Those  two are at it like Cats and Dogs.

EPICNESS!

This road is on the Mouth side of town. It’s a really eat area. It’s a tongue place to drive through.

 

Have a great Sunday

Chuck Norris Facts

You know I love myself some good fun facts. And there’s a man known as Chuck Norris. If you haven’t heard of him…check to make sure he’s not behind you. Well anyway I found a bunch of little tidbits about  Chuck Norris and I thought I’d share a few with you.

  • Chuck Norris and Superman fought once as a bet. The loser had to wear the underwear on the outside of their pants for the rest of their life.
  • Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes together.
  • April doesn’t fool Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris fools April.
  • Chuck Norris can strangle people with cordless phone.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t read. He stares books down until he gets the information he wants.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t get frostbite. He bites frost.
  • Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
  • Ghosts tell Chuck Norris stories.
  • Chuck Norris can sign into Xbox live on his PS3.
  • Chuck Norris can order chick-fil-a on a sunday.
  • When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he already had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

Okay.. let’s admit Chuck Norris is not that great, if he was he’d slam my face into this keyboard. yhuffffffffftr8eghhh8375765///////[??pokirjjaftdfetftrfteyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyift5yi7696076898749S0606060677